The Ant and The Grasshopper (A New Version)

This one is different....two different versions....two different morals

Old Version

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper, thinks the ant is a fool and laughs, dances, and plays the summer away...

Come winter, the ant is warm, well, and fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be Responsible for Yourself!

Modern Version

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs, dances, and plays all summer long.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and fed while he is cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to the ant in his comfortable home with a table full of food.

America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, "It's not that Easy being Green."

ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film them singing, "We shall Overcome." Then Rev Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

President Obama condemns the ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Chirstopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight.

Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike to make pay his fair share.

Finally the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti Grasshopper Act retroactive to begin next summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proprotanate number of green bugs and, having left nothing to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.

The ant disappears into the snow, never to be seen again.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ram shackled, one prosperous, and once peaceful neighborhood.

THE MORAL OF THIS VERSION: BE CAREFUL HOW YOU VOTE IN 2010!